We Can Say No

Genres

Fiction > Contemporary

Content

Central Theme

Learning Concept

Race / Culture

SEL > Self Advocacy, Body Autonomy

we can say no

Author: Lydia Bowers

Illustrator: Isabel Muñoz

Publisher: Free Spirit Publishing

Summary

While circle time at school brings the joy of new stories from Ms. Cindy the librarian, it also brings a feeling of uncertainty for little Zakiya. Zakiya beams with pride over her new braids, but she doesn’t like the way Ms. Cindy touches them without asking, and she isn’t sure what to do about it – after all, Ms. Cindy is a grownup! Luckily, Zakiya leans on her friend Sammy, who confides in the same experiences and feelings. Together, with the encouragement of their class teacher Mr. B., they learn a powerful tool that reignites joy in circle time: SAYING NO! Soon, the whole classroom shares their own desire for physical boundaries – whether it be saying no to a hug or asking others not to touch their wheelchair, the beauty is in choosing. Join these friends and chant along: “Don’t touch my hair, don’t touch my chair!”


Review

This book does an excellent job of explicitly modeling different ways children can say “no” to both peers and adults, emphasizing the importance of body autonomy and consent across a range of scenarios. It’s particularly valuable in showing how to navigate the discomfort of confronting trusted adults, especially when there’s a power imbalance. The character of Mr. B., the teacher, is a great ally to the children, especially young Zakiya and Sammy, whose experiences with hair-touching carry added racial context. He validates their feelings and reinforces the idea that hair is part of your body—no one, not even adults, should touch it without consent.

Sadly, this experience is all too common for children of color. Currently, nearly 80% of teachers in the U.S. are White, many of which are certainly well intentioned but still perpetuate the problem – just as Ms. Cindy depicts in the story. While this story is crucial, it also highlights the unfortunate reality that marginalized groups are often tasked with educating others about their needs. This book’s message about body autonomy should be embraced by all students and teachers, fostering a deeper understanding of respect, boundaries, and consent for everyone.